losing battle

I have fallen into this trap yet again, but this time, i have decided to give up even before i want to try.

I know it may even be hopeless to try or rather THINK of trying, because i jolly well know it can never ever work the way i want it to be. Also, it's too early to decide anything. Fate is what i believe in, but not hoping for.

My mind is still very unsettled, still full with thoughts, some of them unnecessary. Actually, most of them are.

I daresay i am too thoughtful over every minute stuff, rendering me pressurized.

I think that i'm like, alone, without anybody to talk to.

Friends whom i thought i could confide and talk with, have left

sigh sigh sigh

-Joei

downward spiral

I think my grandmother was blessed enough to leave us peacefully. She will always be in me.

Been hyper busy last few weeks. Especially after my grandmother's situation got worse. I am really grateful towards STAFF and AO who gave me time off to visit my grandmother. The wake lasted 5 days, and i stayed up all night for that 5 days. It's seriously exhausting. It's finally over, but i still cannot grasp the fact that i cannot talk to my grandmother anymore. I wonder when i will finally breakdown.

-Joei

it's getting worst

I'm really just praying hard for my grandmother. I just can't seem to be of any help, except to pray hard. =(

I've been thinking a lot and i finally realize what is wrong. I'm rushing things too much. I thought i could handle it, but i always stop short at a point somehow or rather, and it suck. I really feel bad. I mean, I still feel, but i know i won't be able to commit wholeheartedly for now. I know i'm an asshole. Call me a wuss if it so makes u feel better. I'm pushing it too far and i think it's time to fall back a little. I really need to find my track first, if not i know i'll be letting you and myself down.

Take care~

-Joei

everything's going upside down

Seriously, i'm really wondering what the fuck is with people nowadays.

I really fucking hate organizing stuff because i know it will never ever go as planned, and again this proves to be right. I think helping in the chalet organizing will be my last i will ever do. I'm fucking.... no take that back, i'm WAY fucking pissed with people who ditch us the last minute. FUCKTARDS.

Asking people out for a simple meet-up can be such a fucking chore also. I swear i'll never help organize anything ever again.

work fucking suck big time.............

-Joei

super lame

I saw this thread in SGForum about this guy, nick-named "Devilplot", who claims he is a hero in Singapore, where he protects innocent girls from perverts, ranging from peeping tom, all the way to rapist. The so-called "true story" is uber funny i must say, here are some sample:

http://www.sgforums.com/forums/18/topics/298425

http://www.sgforums.com/forums/18/topics/299524

http://www.sgforums.com/forums/18/topics/299299

I was laughing all the way, and i must agree with one of the replies

"Such threads always appear when kids have nothing to do during school holidays and got alot of free time to fantasize"


HAHA

-Joei

dammit

Seriously... what the f**k is wrong nowadays.

I totally cant understand people anymore, and i'm getting sick of letting people get their way.

F**K YOU"LL

-Joei